Essentials for Development

What do we need to develop into great individuals?

Why is it that so many "adults" don't have the necessary components to function as ADULTS?

One possibility is that we don't have the essentials for development and that we didn't receive them as we were growing into ourselves! As a matter of fact, many of us don't grow into ourselves, we grow into what others expect of us!

In order for us to properly develop, there are four essentials to developing!
Safety, Connection, Value, and Love

There are so many people in the world who don't have these needed essentials for development which is why we see war, famine, disease, depression...NAME SOMETHING!

Once again, when we relate to ourselves as adults, we have to learn what we didn't learn as children and re-learn how to relate through our analytical mind!

In my book FEAR: It's Not an Option, I state that you must visualize yourself in a state of being before that state of being will actually manifest! Sometimes the best visualization is made by making a declaration such as "I am safe, connected, valued, and loved."

Pay close attention to how you feel when you say those words, do you really mean them, are you being honest with yourself, or are you like your childhood not feeling any of these things but just re-learning to lie to yourself like the statement "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me."

Also, when in a relationship with someone (including our kids), we cannot only declare that statement to ourselves but to our spouse as well and that will serve as a reminder of the place that we are trying to get to in order to fulfill our vision of life!

Self-affirmation is one of the most powerful tools that we have in order to transform our lives, our friends, our family, our communities, and ultimately all nations! If you can believe it for yourself, others will see the change and ultimately can believe it for oneself!

It’s human nature not only to feel safe, connected, valued, and loved ourselves, but also to make sure everyone else feels that way too.

Tanya A. Alkhaliq -Author, Speaker, Business Success Coach, Minister

Tanya Alkhaliq is an intersex black woman who is a Life Change Expert with an emphasis in intersex issues and counseling while specializing in self-identity development, relationship issues, gender and sexual understandings, spiritual reformations, career choices, young-adult developmental issues, and issues pertaining to fear.

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