Today I would like to discuss the methodology of dating and I'm wondering if we as African-American's have embraced recent technological advances concerning dating! Don't misunderstand what I'm saying! I know that we use technology to find a “hook up” partner and someone with whom to “screw” on a regular but I'm talking about using the same medium in order to find...”THE ONE!”
Now, if we really seek after what is true we will understand that communities that are culturally rich (like ours) usually are more reliant on conventional methods when it comes down to meeting and finding a long-term RELATIONSHIP! So basically what this boils down to is unless we're moving to another city, it is very difficult to meet other singles who are new to the black dating scene so to speak! With that being said though, why is it that we can't open ourselves to the possible opportunity to use online prospectus in order to improve our successes of establishing long-term planned monogamous committed relationships?
Now, if you're in your late 40's or 50's plus, I definitely wouldn't have any issues with you all not accepting dealing with the internet dating, my mom really just learned how to use the computer for more than paying bills and checking email! However, the rest of us who have fought against this concept of turning to technological advances to help within our efforts we put towards dating! We need not regret what is going on in these advances but we really should take a closer look and see it as a change for the better!
FACT: Choosing someone who is compatible is troublesome and we are going to make MANY mistakes along the way! So what is the problem with using the online communities! Based on that very fact, many dating sites have an analysis that one must feel out to help us wad through some of the it'll get rid of all the screw balls but, you have a much better chance through there than we would have meeting them at the ummm CLUB?! Honestly speaking meeting someone online is not always less complicated than meeting someone in life but as with all things both have positives and negatives!
Of course now we deal with the fact that almost all people who have turned to and rely on online technology can be somewhat secure that those people that they meet are in the same situation and are probably using this medium because they themselves face the same issues that you do. I'm sorry but for me, that point alone gives us both a commonality with which to grow into something more stable and serious! We're obviously both tired and we are wanting something more than what we've been getting so the last resort, we have both come to using technology as a final frontier!
Now...the other rules of dating in the black community still apply, don't get that twisted! You need to find someone who is really searching for a solid match, make sure you get to know one another before deciding to spend the night, make sure you have OTHER things in common besides being online as a last resort and sexual fit, and BE CAREFUL WHEN BEGINNING A NEW RELATIONSHIP!
Of course the black dating community is the same as dating any other however you get to retain your rich cultural identity to help you lay a solid foundation for you developing love!
SO GET OUT THERE, SIGN UP, AND GET TO DATING!
Dr. Tanya A. Alkhaliq - Author | Speaker | Minister | Life Redesign ExpertTanya Alkhaliq is an intersex black woman who is a Life Change Expert with an emphasis in intersex issues and counseling while specializing in self-identity development, relationship issues, gender and sexual understandings, spiritual reformations, career choices, young-adult developmental issues, and issues pertaining to fear.
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